As I read this blog post from Drop Bear Exterminator, I couldn’t help feel I was peeking into the mind of my fiance, Dan, who killed himself several years ago. After he died, many people tried to explain to me what he was probably thinking…why he did it…why anyone does it. But, I still always wondered what was going through his mind. Now, I feel like I have a better understanding. Thank you, Wombat.
If we want to prevent more suicides, it’s important for us to understand the state of mind of a suicidal person. We think what they do is illogical, but they have their own logic. And unfortunately, the logic of a suicidal mind is often very strong.
(Note: This is not my current frame of mind)
I wish I hadn’t woke up this morning. I wish that I would just not wake up. Can I stay asleep longer? I can’t feel the misery when I’m asleep. Sleep has run away though.
I don’t want to keep going. I just don’t have it in me to be good enough for the world. I want it all to just disappear. I can’t keep coping with what’s being thrown at me. I can’t live up to everyone’s expectations. The world would be better off without a person like me in it.
I’m sure I have a knife sharp enough to slit my throat. But it’s kind of messy, I don’t want to make a big mess. It’s not fair to whoever needs to clean it up. Maybe if I did it in the shower? Then it would be easy. If…
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