This is who you leave behind when you commit suicide. My heart goes out to all those who are grieving tonight. Hang in there, the pain WILL ease in time.
You who could not stand to hurt the smallest of creatures, how could you end your life so violently? You who knew that I could not stand to see an injured animal, how could you leave me to find my heart and soul in a pool of blood? Oh my God! Please just don’t let this be real, or please let me escape the images and the pain.
Yet I know in my heart that in your darkest hour that morning, you did not wish to hurt me. I just have to believe this. Today I don’t see any way to keep living, but I must because of our son. How I would love to sleep forever and let the pain go.
No one really wants to commit suicide. They just want attention, right? We have all heard it many times before, and many of us probably (at least secretly) believe it to be true, even if we won’t admit it. I will admit it right now. I HAVE struggled with this notion many times, and I KNOW better. Boy, do I know better. Several years ago, my fiance, Dan, committed suicide three weeks after a failed first attempt.
A few months before he died, we had a conversation about his youngest sister. She had attempted suicide on more than one occasion. Do you know what Dan, himself, said to me about his sister? “She doesn’t really want to die, she just wants everyone to feel sorry for her. She needs to grow up and take responsibility for her problems.” What does this mean? Why would a man, who clearly had these thoughts himself, say such callous statements concerning his sister’s suicide attempts? I’ve had years to figure it out, and still, I’m not certain I have.
Depression? Fear? Pain? Desperation? Sheer panic?
Are these answers? If so, why is there a question mark at the end of each ‘answer’?
Every 14 minutes, someone in the U.S. dies by suicide. These statistics are staggering, yet remain hidden and not discussed. But the statistics still don’t answer the question, “Why do people commit suicide?”